...can we talk?

Parents, let’s get real. Being a parent sucks, sometimes. Kids aren’t that great, sometimes. There are times when you understand why some species eat their young.

It doesn’t matter if you are working parent or a stay at home parent. In my eyes, we are all working parents. Parenting is hard, damn hard and extremely thankless. Especially teenagers. Long gone are the days of the cute little baby and adventurous toddler. Now you are housing a half adult- that stomps around the house pissed to the gills when his/her demands aren’t met. Some days, it feels like you’re a hostage negotiator!  You win some and you lose some.

‘Turn off your game, son. You need to empty the dishwasher.’

‘Mom, let me finish this round, ok, like ten more minutes.’

‘ No I need you to do it now.’

‘Geez, Mom- only ten minutes’

‘Ok, you better shut it down after ten minutes or you will lose you chance to play tomorrow’

Then there are days your children manage to shame you. Unintentionally of course- that doesn’t mean it doesn’t hurt.

My son recently said to me-

‘Mom, I need a new back pack, new football gloves and can you buy me a game for the P. S 4?’ ‘No, I can’t buy you a new game, you still have last year’s back pack and where are the gloves I bought you for last season?’
 ‘Why can’t you buy me the game? I don’t know where my gloves are and my back pack is old.’

 ‘ Do you think I am made of money? I don’t have extra for those things right now.’

 ‘ Don’t you have a bank account and a job?

 ‘Yes, I have three accounts, that doesn’t mean there is money in them!

 ‘ I don’t understand how you don’t have money, you have a job!

He had the most condescending tone and disgusted look on his face, he actually made me feel bad about myself.

 

I fired back: ‘Are you playing Football? Do you money one your lunch account? Do you have a roof over your head? Did you eat dinner tonight? THAT’s where all my money goes!’

I realize they are young and do not have a concept of the value of money and things. It’s hard feeling like you don’t measure up to your children’s expectations.

There are days when I look at them whilst they sleep and think ‘Made it through another day. They are fed, alive and only slightly emotionally scarred!’

The reality is, we have a short time with our children before they embark on their own life’s journey. We put too much pressure on ourselves as parents. We have one shot to get it right. Fortunately, there is always therapy! If you fuck it up too bad, your child will spend the rest of their years in therapy blaming you for their short comings.

 

So no pressure Mom’s and Dad’s.

All I know is after my oldest child was a toddler and giving me hell with her daily shenanigans. I apologized to my mother. I was sorry for all the mean things I said to her and all the hateful things I thought. I now know, this was my “payback”.

I would like to hear from other parents. What are your struggles? What are you wins and losses? Do you sometimes feel like you are failing as a parent? Do you sometimes feel like you are running on E- ALL DAY LONG?

 

 

Let's talk about it..